Quote

Next to a shot of some good, habit-forming narcotic, there is nothing like travelling alone as a 'builder-upper.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Nothing
Forming
Good
Upper
Like
Shot
Solitude
Shots
Narcotic
Habit
Narcotics
Alone
Travelling
Next
Builder

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Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.
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Sheer madness is, of course, the highest possible brow in humor.
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Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of
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I never liked bananas much anyway. Two-thirds of the way down even one banana I am willing to concede defeat smilingly and give the rest to the nearest monkey.
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The most common of all antagonisms arises from a man's taking a seat beside you on the train, a seat to which he is completely entitled.
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Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got.
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There is no doubt that every healthy, normal boy...should own a dog at some time in his life, preferably between the ages of forty-five and fifty.
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A man gets on a train with his little boy, and gives the conductor only one ticket. 'How old's your kid?' the conductor says, and the father says, 'He's four years old.' 'He looks at least twelve to me,' says the conductor. And the father says, 'Can I help it if he worries?
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The only cure for a real hangover is death.
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We are constantly being surprised that people did things well before we were born.
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Traveling with children corresponds roughly to traveling third class in Bulgaria.
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I have often wondered how they manage to get return envelopes which miss, by one-quarter of an inch, fitting the blank you are supposed to return. They say, Please fill out and return the enclosed envelope, and the enclosed envelope is always one-quarter of an inch too small.
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The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him. That remark in itself wouldn't make any sense if quoted as it stands.
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The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such a state that no family of characters is considered true to life whichdoes not include at least two hypochondriacs, one sadist, and one old man who spills food down the front of his vest.
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What is to be done with people who can't read a Sunday paper without messing it all up?... Show me a Sunday paper which has been left in a condition fit only for kite flying, and I will show you an antisocial and dangerous character who has left it that way.
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Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.
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A freelance is one who gets paid by the word -- per piece or perhaps.
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
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Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.
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My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out.
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