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She sleeps alone at last.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Lasts
Last
Sleeps
Funny
Manners
Death
Suicide
Humor
Sleep
Alone
Moral

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Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
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A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
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The art of cursing people seems to have lost its tang since the old days when a good malediction took four deep breaths to deliverand sent the outfielders scurrying toward the fence to field.
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I don't want to be an alarmist, but I think that the Younger Generation is up to something.... I base my apprehension on nothing more definite than the fact that they are always coming in and going out of the house, without any apparent reason.
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It has always seemed to me that the most difficult part of building a bridge would be the start.
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We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door, simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.
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The discovery of phobias by psychiatrists has done much to clear the atmosphere. Whereas in the old days a person would say: 'Let's get the heck out of here!' today she says: 'Let's get the heck out of here! I've got claustrophobia.
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Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.
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If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from.
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Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets him have one
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An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
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There is probably no more obnoxious class of citizen, taken end for end, than the returning vacationist.
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We are constantly being surprised that people did things well before we were born.
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There are two ways to travel, first class or with children.
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In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.
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Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about.
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There is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
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If you look at eggs, you will see that each one is almost round but not quite ... Nature's way of distinguishing eggs from large golf balls.
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Sunday morning may be cheery enough, with its extra cup of coffee and litter of Sunday newspapers, but there is always hanging over it the ominous threat of 3 P.M., when the sun gets around to the back windows and life stops dead in its tracks.
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