Quote

At fifteen one is first beginning to realize that everything isn't money and power in this world, and is casting about for joys that do not turn to dross in one's hands.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
First
Realizing
World
Turn
Dross
Turns
Joys
Money
Casting
Hands
Fifteen
Power
Beginning
Firsts
Realize
Everything
Joy

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But compared with the task of selecting a piece of French pastry held by an impatient waiter a move in chess is like reaching for a salary check in its demand on the contemplative faculties.
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This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
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There are several ways to apportion the family income, all of them unsatisfactory.
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The only cure for a real hangover is death.
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What is to be done with people who can't read a Sunday paper without messing it all up?... Show me a Sunday paper which has been left in a condition fit only for kite flying, and I will show you an antisocial and dangerous character who has left it that way.
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
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In preparing the soil for planting, you will need several tools. Dynamite would be a beautiful thing to use, but it would have a tendency to get the dirt into the front-hall and track up the stairs.
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One of the easiest forms of pretense to break down is the pretense of enthusiasm for exotic foods. Just bring on the exotic foods.
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Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets him have one
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Work is a form of nervousness.
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There is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
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Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.
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Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
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A man gets on a train with his little boy, and gives the conductor only one ticket. 'How old's your kid?' the conductor says, and the father says, 'He's four years old.' 'He looks at least twelve to me,' says the conductor. And the father says, 'Can I help it if he worries?
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There is probably no more obnoxious class of citizen, taken end for end, than the returning vacationist.
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A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
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The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
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Who has not wished that his host would come out frankly at the beginning of the visit and state, in no uncertain terms, the rulesand preferences of the household in such matters as the breakfast hour? And who has not sounded out his guest to find out what he likes in the regulation of his diet and modus vivendi (mode of living)?
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If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from.
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A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
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