Quote

At fifteen one is first beginning to realize that everything isn't money and power in this world, and is casting about for joys that do not turn to dross in one's hands.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Power
Beginning
Firsts
Realize
Everything
Joy
First
Realizing
World
Turn
Dross
Turns
Joys
Money
Casting
Hands
Fifteen

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Sheer madness is, of course, the highest possible brow in humor.
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What is to be done with people who can't read a Sunday paper without messing it all up?... Show me a Sunday paper which has been left in a condition fit only for kite flying, and I will show you an antisocial and dangerous character who has left it that way.
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Next to an old-fashioned church social, or possibly a monster bridge party, there is no buzz which can equal the sibilant buzz ofa matinée.
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The discovery of phobias by psychiatrists has done much to clear the atmosphere. Whereas in the old days a person would say: 'Let's get the heck out of here!' today she says: 'Let's get the heck out of here! I've got claustrophobia.
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The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him. That remark in itself wouldn't make any sense if quoted as it stands.
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Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.
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This congestion in the post offices is due to what are technically known as regulations but what are really a series of acrostics and anagrams devised by some officials who got around a table one night and tried to be funny.
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There is no doubt that every healthy, normal boy...should own a dog at some time in his life, preferably between the ages of forty-five and fifty.
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An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
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Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.
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I never liked bananas much anyway. Two-thirds of the way down even one banana I am willing to concede defeat smilingly and give the rest to the nearest monkey.
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There are two ways to travel, first class or with children.
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One of the great natural phenomena is the way in which a tube of toothpaste suddenly empties itself when it hears that you are planning a trip, so that when you come to pack it is just a twisted shell of its former self, with not even a cubic millimeter left to be squeezed out.
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If Shakespeare were alive today and writing comedy for the movies, he would be the head-liner for the Mack Sennett studios.
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Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets him have one
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We are constantly being surprised that people did things well before we were born.
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I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.
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