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Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman without feeling just a bit unchivalrous.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Even
Steps
Men
Comedy
Bits
Feeling
Woman
Nowadays
Death
Suicide
Feelings
Kill
Without
Step

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Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.
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Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.
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My only solution for the problem of habitual accidents is to stay in bed all day. Even then, there is always the chance that you will fall out.
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In Milwaukee last month a man died laughing over one of his own jokes. That's what makes it so tough for us outsiders. We have to fight home competition.
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A man may take care of a furnace for twenty-five years and still forget to duck his head when he starts going down the cellar stairs.
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Streets full of water. Please Advise.
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You won't find one fish in a million that has enough sense to come in when it rains.
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But compared with the task of selecting a piece of French pastry held by an impatient waiter a move in chess is like reaching for a salary check in its demand on the contemplative faculties.
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If you look at eggs, you will see that each one is almost round but not quite ... Nature's way of distinguishing eggs from large golf balls.
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Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.
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All laughter is a muscular rigidity spasmodically relieved by involuntary twitching.
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
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For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.
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I am pretty sure that, if you will be quite honest, you will admit that a good rousing sneeze, one that tears open your collar and throws your hair into your eyes, is really one of life's sensational pleasures.
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I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.
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There are two ways to travel, first class or with children.
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