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Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.
Robert Benchley
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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Cannot
Length
Children
Ideal
Dachshunds
Much
Harm
Canine
Way
Ideals
Stretched
Dog
Puppy
Already
Pulled
Small
Pet
Child
Dogs
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The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
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Traveling with children corresponds roughly to traveling third class in Bulgaria.
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There are two ways to travel, first class or with children.
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There is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
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In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.
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If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from.
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Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about.
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The only cure for a real hangover is death.
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One cubic foot less of space and it would have constituted adultery.
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In preparing the soil for planting, you will need several tools. Dynamite would be a beautiful thing to use, but it would have a tendency to get the dirt into the front-hall and track up the stairs.
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There are several ways to apportion the family income, all of them unsatisfactory.
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All laughter is a muscular rigidity spasmodically relieved by involuntary twitching.
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A man may take care of a furnace for twenty-five years and still forget to duck his head when he starts going down the cellar stairs.
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