Math was a two-part exam and I once didn't go for the second part. I knew I'd done so badly on the first it was hopeless. I re-took it about four or five times. I think I eventually got it by getting the top GCSE grade.

I would have to say my earthy sensuality - although I should point out that the backs of my calves are exemplary and my upper inner thigh is a delight.

I just look like someone with a long face. Not just A. P. McCoy himself, but some of the horses he rides.

I do seem to look like a lot of people.

When you're doing stand-up, you can comment if something fails, get a laugh from that.

I still have lots of friends from my pre-success days.

I like witty people, people who can be witty on the spot.

I'm prone to a more depressed outlook on life.

When you're a kid, I think you want to be a film star. And I'm not as enamoured with that any more. The reality of that life is a lot of travel, and a lot of being away, which is impractical because I have four children, so I don't want to be away that much, not the other side of the world away.

I'm a very, very handsome man, and have had to come to terms with it... um, do I like the way I look? In the right light, and with a following wind.

I had a moment where I realised I could do silly voices, that lots of people I knew couldn't do silly voices, and that thus I must be able to make money doing silly voices.

If you're a comedian, you are looking for material in daily life.

Terribly sad news about Stuart Cable, such a lovely, warm, funny, talented man.

The thing is, when I had my first success it did coincide with the end of my first marriage, and because I went on to have a very, very unhappy two years, I don't think I equate career success with personal happiness.