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I want to have young children although my mother and father are even now young sufficient to just take care of them.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Although
Father
Mother
Young
Care
Take
Children
Even
Sufficient

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Men own basketball teams. Every year cheerleaders' outfits get tighter and briefer, and players' shorts get baggier and longer.
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I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
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Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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If your husband has difficulty getting to sleep, the words 'we need to talk about our relationship' may help.
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The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
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My father was never very friendly. When I was growing up, I thought the doorbell ringing was a signal to pretend you weren't home.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.
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My new dress. Do you like it? It's from my favorite designer, On Sale.
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A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
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When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
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I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I've gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends... one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body.
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Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, Never take candy from strangers. And then they dressed me up and said, Go beg for it. I didn't know what to do. I'd knock on people's doors and go, Trick or treat.
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Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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Be careful of men who are bald and rich the arrogance of rich usually cancels out the nice of bald.
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Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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