Quote

After you've dated someone it should be legal to stamp them with what's wrong with them so the next person doesn't have to start from scratch.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Next
Dated
Doesn
Stamp
Scratch
Someone
Scratches
Persons
Stamps
Person
Legal
Start
Wrong

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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
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How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue...and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go?
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I just don't get cats. To me, they're a waste of fur.
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The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him
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Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
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The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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Men own basketball teams. Every year cheerleaders' outfits get tighter and briefer, and players' shorts get baggier and longer.
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
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When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
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Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
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I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.
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Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
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I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups.
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I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I'm lying.
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All men look at Dr. Ruth and wonder how she has gained all that sexual experience.
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I hate learning through experience. Just once I'd like to learn something because someone was nice enough to tell me in advance.
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Be careful of men who are bald and rich the arrogance of rich usually cancels out the nice of bald.
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Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.
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