Quote

My cousin just got married for the totally wrong reasons. She married a man for money. She wasn't real subtle about it. Instead of calling him her fiancé, she kept calling him her financee.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Wrong
Subtle
Money
Kept
Reason
Totally
Real
Reasons
Men
Calling
Married
Instead
Fianc
Wasn
Cousin

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I was a ballerina. I had to quit after I injured a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.
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I get a lot of return business. I think it's all those years I put in traveling around the country people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again.
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My Vegas act is how I make my money.
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
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Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
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Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, Never take candy from strangers. And then they dressed me up and said, Go beg for it. I didn't know what to do. I'd knock on people's doors and go, Trick or treat.
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
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A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.
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Los Angeles is a very transient town. It's the only place I know where you can actually rent a dog.
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I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.
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Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.
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Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
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I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!
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My new dress. Do you like it? It's from my favorite designer, On Sale.
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