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Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Even
Men
Like
People
Furniture
Bears
Live
Wells
Well

More quotes by Rita Rudner

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I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.
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I don't look back. I'm like a shark - I only look forward.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
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My father watched football with the sound off because he lived in fear of hearing the voice of Howard Cosell.
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If you like easygoing, monogamous men, stay away from billionaires.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.
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I loved my mother very much, but she was not a good cook. Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before. In our house Thanksgiving was a time for sorrow.
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Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
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Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
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Going out to eat is expensive. I was out at one restaurant and they didn't have prices on the menu. Just faces with different expressions of horror.
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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Envy the kangaroo. That pouch setup is extraordinary the baby crawls out of the womb when it is about two inches long, gets into the pouch, and proceeds to mature. I'd have a baby if it would develop in my handbag.
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When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
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My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
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Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.
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Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before.
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My Vegas act is how I make my money.
Rita Rudner