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The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Funny
Tell
Else
Care
Ever
Mirror
Looks
Mirrors
Way
Humor
Men
Anyone

More quotes by Rita Rudner

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Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
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A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
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I get so happy when I write a joke. It's a very satisfying, liberating feeling.
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Be careful of men who are bald and rich the arrogance of rich usually cancels out the nice of bald.
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Most women are introspective: Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled? Most men are outrospective: Did my team win? How's my car?
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One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.
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How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue...and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go?
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A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
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My parents were glad to see that my new husband looks like a 'regular guy'-no earring or anything. But really I think a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage. I mean, he's already experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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I had no desire to be a stand-up comic until I decided to do it.
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Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
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I don't like when there's too much conversation because I'm shy and it makes me uncomfortable.
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Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.
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My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
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Going out to eat is expensive. I was out at one restaurant and they didn't have prices on the menu. Just faces with different expressions of horror.
Rita Rudner