Quote

Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Type
Humor
Nerdy
Easier
Bathing
Funny
Depressing
Two
Types
Women
Suits
Men
Buying
Time
Clothes

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My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
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I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.
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Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
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Never take candy from strangers.
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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.
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Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
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When you're a dancer, you start with the basics. You don't all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with first position, second, third.
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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Waiters and waitresses are becoming nicer and much more caring. I used to pay my check, they would say Thank you. That's now escalated into You care care of yourself, now. The other day I paid my check and the waiter said, Don't put off that mammogram.
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All men look at Dr. Ruth and wonder how she has gained all that sexual experience.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.
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