Quote

Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Two
Types
Women
Suits
Men
Buying
Time
Clothes
Type
Humor
Nerdy
Easier
Bathing
Funny
Depressing

More quotes by Rita Rudner

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My Vegas act is how I make my money.
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I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
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I just don't get cats. To me, they're a waste of fur.
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I don't like when there's too much conversation because I'm shy and it makes me uncomfortable.
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
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Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
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All men look at Dr. Ruth and wonder how she has gained all that sexual experience.
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Men don't feel the urge to get married as quickly as women do because their clothes all button and zip in the front. Women's dresses usually button and zip in the back. We need men emotionally and sexually, but we also need men to help us get dressed.
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My cousin just got married for the totally wrong reasons. She married a man for money. She wasn't real subtle about it. Instead of calling him her fiancé, she kept calling him her financee.
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My new dress. Do you like it? It's from my favorite designer, On Sale.
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Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.
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My father was never very friendly. When I was growing up, I thought the doorbell ringing was a signal to pretend you weren't home.
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My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
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I hate learning through experience. Just once I'd like to learn something because someone was nice enough to tell me in advance.
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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My parents were glad to see that my new husband looks like a 'regular guy'-no earring or anything. But really I think a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage. I mean, he's already experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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I loved my mother very much, but she was not a good cook. Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before. In our house Thanksgiving was a time for sorrow.
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If your husband has difficulty getting to sleep, the words 'we need to talk about our relationship' may help.
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Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before.
Rita Rudner