Quote

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Humor
Amount
Comedy
Actually
Exceed
Funny
Grieving
Never
Spent
Men
Time
Spend

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Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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I burned sixty calories. That should take care of a peanut I had in 1962.
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I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.
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The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
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Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
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My father watched football with the sound off because he lived in fear of hearing the voice of Howard Cosell.
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I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.
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When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
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I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I'm lying.
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Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.
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All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.
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Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.
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Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
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I had no desire to be a stand-up comic until I decided to do it.
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
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