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Never take candy from strangers.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Candy
Stranger
Take
Never
Halloween
Strangers

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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
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Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, Never take candy from strangers. And then they dressed me up and said, Go beg for it. I didn't know what to do. I'd knock on people's doors and go, Trick or treat.
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My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
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My cousin just got married for the totally wrong reasons. She married a man for money. She wasn't real subtle about it. Instead of calling him her fiancé, she kept calling him her financee.
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One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.
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Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.
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All men look at Dr. Ruth and wonder how she has gained all that sexual experience.
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Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.
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When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
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The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.
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You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
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I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself well, that's not going to happen
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
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A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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After you've dated someone it should be legal to stamp them with what's wrong with them so the next person doesn't have to start from scratch.
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To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'
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