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My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Humor
Funny
Lousy
House
Thanksgiving
Mother
Cook
Time
Memorable
Cooks
Sorrow

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Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before.
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I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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My parents were glad to see that my new husband looks like a 'regular guy'-no earring or anything. But really I think a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage. I mean, he's already experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself well, that's not going to happen
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I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers to attract men? Men don't like flowers. I have a great idea for a scent that will attract men - how about New Car Interior?
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