Quote

I was a ballerina. I had to quit after I injured a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Mines
Groin
Mine
Ballerina
Dance
Muscle
Wasn
Injured
Quit
Muscles
Quitting
Dancing

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Be careful of men who are bald and rich the arrogance of rich usually cancels out the nice of bald.
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Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.
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I had no desire to be a stand-up comic until I decided to do it.
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I want to have young children although my mother and father are even now young sufficient to just take care of them.
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The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
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Men don't mature. Marry a younger one.
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My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
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My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
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Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
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The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him
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Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
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How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue...and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go?
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I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.
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I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!
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Wives are people who think it's against the law not to answer the phone when it rings.
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I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
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Only men who have worn a ski suit understand how complicated it is for a woman to go to the bathroom when she's wearing a jumpsuit.
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