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I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
World
Windows
Boring
Clean
Window
Office
Jobs
Inspirational
Used
Envelopes

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Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers to attract men? Men don't like flowers. I have a great idea for a scent that will attract men - how about New Car Interior?
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I don't like when there's too much conversation because I'm shy and it makes me uncomfortable.
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Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
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It takes six months to get into shape and two weeks to get out of shape. Once you know this you can stop being angry about other things in life and only be angry about this.
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My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
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Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.
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Be careful of men who are bald and rich the arrogance of rich usually cancels out the nice of bald.
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I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.
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When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.
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Waiters and waitresses are becoming nicer and much more caring. I used to pay my check, they would say Thank you. That's now escalated into You care care of yourself, now. The other day I paid my check and the waiter said, Don't put off that mammogram.
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
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When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
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I loved my mother very much, but she was not a good cook. Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before. In our house Thanksgiving was a time for sorrow.
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The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.
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One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
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Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
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Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
Rita Rudner