Quote

How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue...and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go?

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Add
Cooking
Food
Flour
Water
Glue
Doe
Culinary
Together
Cake
Come
Sugar
Eggs

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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.
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Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
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Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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I adore being hitched. It's so extraordinary to discover one unique individual you need to irritate for whatever remains of your life.
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I get a lot of return business. I think it's all those years I put in traveling around the country people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again.
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Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code... he turned himself in.
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Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
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Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
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Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
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Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
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My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
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Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
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I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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