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There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Humor
Better
Different
Kind
Introspective
Sarcastic
Fit
Kinds
Personality

More quotes by Rita Rudner

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My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
Rita Rudner
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I burned sixty calories. That should take care of a peanut I had in 1962.
Rita Rudner
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A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
Rita Rudner
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Going out to eat is expensive. I was out at one restaurant and they didn't have prices on the menu. Just faces with different expressions of horror.
Rita Rudner
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Men don't feel the urge to get married as quickly as women do because their clothes all button and zip in the front. Women's dresses usually button and zip in the back. We need men emotionally and sexually, but we also need men to help us get dressed.
Rita Rudner
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I loved my mother very much, but she was not a good cook. Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before. In our house Thanksgiving was a time for sorrow.
Rita Rudner
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Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
Rita Rudner
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We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
Rita Rudner
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I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.
Rita Rudner
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Men don't mature. Marry a younger one.
Rita Rudner
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
Rita Rudner
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Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, Are we going to have sex again? He said, Yes, but not with each other.
Rita Rudner
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When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
Rita Rudner
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The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.
Rita Rudner
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I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself well, that's not going to happen
Rita Rudner
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If you like easygoing, monogamous men, stay away from billionaires.
Rita Rudner
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My father was never very friendly. When I was growing up, I thought the doorbell ringing was a signal to pretend you weren't home.
Rita Rudner
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My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
Rita Rudner
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
Rita Rudner
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Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
Rita Rudner