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My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Boyfriend
Dating
Witty
Broke
Married
Marriage
Didn
Breakup
Wanted
Valentine

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I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!
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My father watched football with the sound off because he lived in fear of hearing the voice of Howard Cosell.
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To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'
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Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.
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My father was never very friendly. When I was growing up, I thought the doorbell ringing was a signal to pretend you weren't home.
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
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If I say a joke and the audience laughs it makes me feel good.
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The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
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Only men who have worn a ski suit understand how complicated it is for a woman to go to the bathroom when she's wearing a jumpsuit.
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I hate learning through experience. Just once I'd like to learn something because someone was nice enough to tell me in advance.
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Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
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I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.
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No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
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Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.
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A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
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I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.
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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
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Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.
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When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.
Rita Rudner