Quote

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.

Rita Rudner

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Rita Rudner
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: September 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Voice Actor
Miami
Florida
Great
Purpose
Really
Makes
Heartbroken
Love
Someone
Outfit
Doe
Breakup
Better
Shop
Feel
Shops
Sometimes
Relationship
Feels
Break

More quotes by Rita Rudner

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I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!
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If your husband has difficulty getting to sleep, the words 'we need to talk about our relationship' may help.
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I don't look back. I'm like a shark - I only look forward.
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Most women are introspective: Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled? Most men are outrospective: Did my team win? How's my car?
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Los Angeles is a very transient town. It's the only place I know where you can actually rent a dog.
Rita Rudner
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Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before.
Rita Rudner
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You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
Rita Rudner
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My Vegas act is how I make my money.
Rita Rudner
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If I say a joke and the audience laughs it makes me feel good.
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Why are women wearing perfumes that smell like flowers to attract men? Men don't like flowers. I have a great idea for a scent that will attract men - how about New Car Interior?
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One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.
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All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.
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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
Rita Rudner
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Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.
Rita Rudner
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I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups.
Rita Rudner
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Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.
Rita Rudner
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I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
Rita Rudner
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If you like easygoing, monogamous men, stay away from billionaires.
Rita Rudner
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I have been doing leg lifts faithfully for about fifteen years, and the only thing that has gotten thinner is the carpet where I have been doing the leg lifts.
Rita Rudner
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I get so happy when I write a joke. It's a very satisfying, liberating feeling.
Rita Rudner