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Television: The device that brings into your living room characters you would never allow in your living room.
Red Skelton
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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Would
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Characters
Room
Rooms
Television
Living
Device
Character
Devices
Never
Brings
More quotes by Red Skelton
Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
Red Skelton
I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
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Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
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Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
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I left home because I was hungry.
Red Skelton
My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled.
Red Skelton
I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
Red Skelton
I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
Red Skelton
I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
Red Skelton
We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
Red Skelton
I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
Red Skelton
You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first.
Red Skelton
I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
Red Skelton
Congress: Bingo with billions.
Red Skelton
She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
Red Skelton
I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton
People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
Red Skelton
Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.
Red Skelton
Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
Red Skelton
