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Television: The device that brings into your living room characters you would never allow in your living room.
Red Skelton
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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Characters
Room
Rooms
Television
Living
Device
Character
Devices
Never
Brings
Would
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More quotes by Red Skelton
Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
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A fellow told me he was going to hang-glider school. He said, 'I've been going for three months. ' I said, 'How many successful jumps do you need to make before you graduate?' He said, 'All of them. '
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I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
Red Skelton
All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
Red Skelton
Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.
Red Skelton
Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
Red Skelton
I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
Red Skelton
I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
Red Skelton
She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
Red Skelton
I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton
I only come to life when there are people watching.
Red Skelton
Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
Red Skelton
I left home because I was hungry.
Red Skelton
Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
Red Skelton
I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
Red Skelton
People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
Red Skelton
Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
Red Skelton