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I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
Red Skelton
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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Sixth
Wasn
Five
Making
Sense
Away
Money
More quotes by Red Skelton
I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
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Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
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People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
I only come to life when there are people watching.
Red Skelton
It proves what they say, give the public what they want to see and they'll come out for it.
Red Skelton
I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
Red Skelton
Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
Red Skelton
Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
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You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
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My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled.
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All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
Red Skelton
If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
Red Skelton
Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
Red Skelton
I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton
Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
Red Skelton
I was a sober as the next guy. The only problem is the next guy was Dean Martin
Red Skelton
