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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.

Red Skelton

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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Politicians
Pick
Picks
Politician
Politics
Done
Nothin

More quotes by Red Skelton

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I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
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I left home because I was hungry.
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I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
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I only come to life when there are people watching.
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Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
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I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
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I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
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Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
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Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.
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You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first.
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If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
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You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
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A fellow told me he was going to hang-glider school. He said, 'I've been going for three months. ' I said, 'How many successful jumps do you need to make before you graduate?' He said, 'All of them. '
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
Red Skelton
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No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds.
Red Skelton
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People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
Red Skelton
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She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
Red Skelton