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She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
Red Skelton
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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Inspiration
Wife
Days
Mud
Funny
Pack
Two
Packs
Great
Fell
Looked
Humor
More quotes by Red Skelton
Congress: Bingo with billions.
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My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled.
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No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds.
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I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
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Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
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I left home because I was hungry.
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Television: The device that brings into your living room characters you would never allow in your living room.
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If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
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Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
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Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
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I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
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You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
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I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
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Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
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Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
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