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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

Red Skelton

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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Narrowness
Waist
Places
Age
Change
Mind

More quotes by Red Skelton

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Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
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I was a sober as the next guy. The only problem is the next guy was Dean Martin
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I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
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If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
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Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
Red Skelton
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I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
Red Skelton
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I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
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She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
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It proves what they say, give the public what they want to see and they'll come out for it.
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I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
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No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds.
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I left home because I was hungry.
Red Skelton
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Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
Red Skelton
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I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
Red Skelton
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People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
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I only come to life when there are people watching.
Red Skelton
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A fellow told me he was going to hang-glider school. He said, 'I've been going for three months. ' I said, 'How many successful jumps do you need to make before you graduate?' He said, 'All of them. '
Red Skelton
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Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
Red Skelton