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Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
Red Skelton
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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Always
Recipe
Recipes
Shops
Marriage
Hold
Wife
Happy
Hands
More quotes by Red Skelton
Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
Red Skelton
Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
Red Skelton
I only come to life when there are people watching.
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You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
Red Skelton
Television: The device that brings into your living room characters you would never allow in your living room.
Red Skelton
It proves what they say, give the public what they want to see and they'll come out for it.
Red Skelton
I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
Red Skelton
I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
Red Skelton
I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
Red Skelton
We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
Red Skelton
I was a sober as the next guy. The only problem is the next guy was Dean Martin
Red Skelton
Congress: Bingo with billions.
Red Skelton
All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
Red Skelton
If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
Red Skelton
Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
Red Skelton
Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
Red Skelton
I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
Red Skelton
I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
Red Skelton
You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first.
Red Skelton
