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Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

Red Skelton

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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Always
Recipe
Recipes
Shops
Marriage
Hold
Wife
Happy
Hands

More quotes by Red Skelton

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If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.
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You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first.
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I only come to life when there are people watching.
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Imitation isn't the sincerest form of flattery - it's plagiarism.
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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
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Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.
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Congress: Bingo with billions.
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She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
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Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
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Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap
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My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled.
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I left home because I was hungry.
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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
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I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.
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I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
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Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
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I was a sober as the next guy. The only problem is the next guy was Dean Martin
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I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton