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I left home because I was hungry.

Red Skelton

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Red Skelton
Age: 84 †
Born: 1913
Born: July 18
Died: 1997
Died: September 17
Circus Performer
Comedian
Composer
Entertainer
Film Actor
Painter
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Richard Bernard Skelton
Richard Skelton
Richard Red Skelton
Hungry
Left
Home

More quotes by Red Skelton

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I don't pick on politicians. They ain't done nothin'.
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She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off
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I was a sober as the next guy. The only problem is the next guy was Dean Martin
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I only come to life when there are people watching.
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Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age.
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People think I am dead because they haven’t seen me around for awhile. I’m not dead, I’m very much alive, as you can see. Although, there are two things I do before I get up every morning. I look around and if I don’t smell flowers or see candles flickering I go ahead and get up.
Red Skelton
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We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas
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You know how to tell when you're getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist.
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No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds.
Red Skelton
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I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.
Red Skelton
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Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics.
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Congress: Bingo with billions.
Red Skelton
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You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first.
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
Red Skelton
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All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
Red Skelton
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I have a sixth sense, but not the other five. If I wasn't making money, they'd put me away.
Red Skelton
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I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up.
Red Skelton
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Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
Red Skelton
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I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.
Red Skelton
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I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God.
Red Skelton