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Dracula, who said while they drove a wooden stake into his heart, Boy, I sure hope this is heartburn. Never got a dinner!
Red Buttons
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Red Buttons
Age: 87 †
Born: 1919
Born: February 5
Died: 2006
Died: July 13
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Aaron Chwatt
Dinner
Boys
Sure
Heartburn
Hope
Dracula
Heart
Wooden
Never
Drove
Stake
Stakes
More quotes by Red Buttons
Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner!
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Simon Peter, who embarrassed the other disciples at the Last Supper by asking for seconds. Never got a dinner!
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Dean Martin's pancreas, who overheard his liver singing I got a right to sing the blues. Never got a dinner!
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Long John Silver's wife, Short, who said to John, If the shoe fits... Never got a dinner!
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King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner!
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Ponce de Leon, who said when he discovered the Fountain of Youth, Where the hell are the paper cups? Never got a dinner!
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Moshe Dayan, who said to Sammy Davis, Jr., That's funny, to me you only look half Jewish. Never got a dinner!
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Moshe Dayan, who donated his eye to CBS. Never got a dinner!
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Lot, who said to his wife as she was being turned into a pillar of salt, Stop shaking! Never got a dinner!
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Adam, who said to our Lord in the Garden of Eden, I got more ribs - you got more broads? Never got a dinner!
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Sophia Loren, whose new baby asked her, Is all that for me? Never got a dinner!
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Steven Spielberg's mother, who said to E.T., I don't care where you're from, you're here and you're gonna get bar mitzvahed! Never got a dinner!
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Henry Ford, who despite his immense wealth never owned a Cadillac. Never got a dinner!
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Zsa Zsa Gabor, the only woman ever to apply for group alimony. Never got a dinner!
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Billy Carter, who asked his brother Jimmy, Do you think you could get me on the Gong Show? Never got a dinner!
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Sydney Poitier, who said to Lester Maddox, Guess who's not coming to dinner? Never got a dinner!
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Orson Welles, who said to Anita Bryant, Stop picketing me. What I said was I was a thespian. Never got a dinner!
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Gandhi, who went to Wendy's and asked, Where's the belief? Never got a dinner!
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Maid Marion, who said to Robin Hood, I will not live in a house with a Little John. Never got a dinner!
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Making you a pioneer only means one thing. You were around at the time.
Red Buttons
