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I'm always giving myself the Alzheimer's test. My shrink told me to do this. It takes one minute. You name every word that comes to mind that begins with the letter F.

Ray Romano

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Ray Romano
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: December 21
Actor
Film Actor
Poker Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Queens
New York
Raymond Romano
Raymond Albert Ray Romano
Raymond Albert Romano
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Alzheimer
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More quotes by Ray Romano

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Parents, just keep in mind that kids will always round off to the nearest obscenity.
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In a way, comedy is like sex. The more noise you hear, the better you think you're doing.
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I don't think men talk as much as women, but when we have something on our minds we'll get it out.
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I have the show because I'm insecure. It's my insecurity that makes me want to be a comic, that makes me need the audience.
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I have this mistress: show business.
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You know, a TV show is a slow build.
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When you wake up one day and say, You know what? I don't think I ever need to sleep or have sex again. Congratulations, you're ready (to have children).
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The comics that are just conversing with you up there and drawing on their own life, yeah, I guess so. I guess some do political humor, some do topical humor, but the ones that I like, the ones that are appealing to me, were guys who were just talking to you about their life.
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Without identical twins, you'll never get to experience entering a hotel room with one of them and watching him run into the full-length mirror because he though he saw his brother.
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The married man has all but eliminated that worry from his life, simply because his wife knows all about him: the good, the bad, and the tiny.
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I don't want to say work is who I am, but some people feel more centered and more whole when they're producing and creating.
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Mick Jagger also a music connoisseur and knows everything about that era. So, you knew the music side was going to be top-notch. It's HBO. On Men of Certain Age, if we wanted a song, it would break the bank. But, Vinyl can go all-out.
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That's when you know you're a true married couple: when you have to apologize for what you did in her dream.
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It was very nerve-wracking for me. I had to be drunk and have a threesome. I'm not that guy. Bobby Cannavale is that guy. But it was Vegas and things got crazy, and it happened. We go to Vegas to try to sign Elvis Presley and things get crazy. My character [in Vinyl] is stoned.
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My daughter's tricycle said Some Assembly Required. It came in a jar.
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Flappers sounds like where waitresses go after they're too old to work at Hooters.
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That's the one thing I have over any twenty-one-year-old: a proud history of accumulated neuroses. That's the game in which I'm da man.
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It seems to be a common denominator with a lot of comics, this low self-esteem thing.
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I love standup and I haven't given it up.
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You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me.
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