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The more I go through parenting, the more I say I owe my mother an apology.

Ray Romano

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Ray Romano
Age: 66
Born: 1957
Born: December 21
Actor
Film Actor
Poker Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Queens
New York
Raymond Romano
Raymond Albert Ray Romano
Raymond Albert Romano
Apology
Parenting
Inspirational
Mother

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As an actor, that's nerve-wracking enough [drunk and doing coke] because you have to do it at the right level.
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You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me.
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Identical twins. I'm glad they're identical 'cause you save money on photographs. That's what I like. Yeah. Here's my little boy. I got another one just like it.
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Nothing like a little chest pain to restore your faith.
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The comics that are just conversing with you up there and drawing on their own life, yeah, I guess so. I guess some do political humor, some do topical humor, but the ones that I like, the ones that are appealing to me, were guys who were just talking to you about their life.
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I would get my student loans, get money, register and never really go. It was a system I thought would somehow pan out.
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I don't think men talk as much as women, but when we have something on our minds we'll get it out.
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I like doing film, you know, single-camera.
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If I have sex, I know my quarterly estimated taxes must be due. And if it's oral sex, I know it's time to renew my driver's license.
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Parents, just keep in mind that kids will always round off to the nearest obscenity.
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It was very nerve-wracking for me. I had to be drunk and have a threesome. I'm not that guy. Bobby Cannavale is that guy. But it was Vegas and things got crazy, and it happened. We go to Vegas to try to sign Elvis Presley and things get crazy. My character [in Vinyl] is stoned.
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People are going to see both of us and think it's an Abbott and Costello kind of thing. It's not an easy switch. It's not an easy transition from TV to film.
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I wasn't really that informed about the two-year-old. Oh, I'd read about them, and occasionally I'd see documentaries on the Discovery Channel showing two-year-olds in the wild, where they belong.
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I can't complain about my career, that's for sure.
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I love standup and I haven't given it up.
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In a way, comedy is like sex. The more noise you hear, the better you think you're doing.
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The married man has all but eliminated that worry from his life, simply because his wife knows all about him: the good, the bad, and the tiny.
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For the sake of your marriage, get a king-size bed. And if you really want to stay married, get two.
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My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.
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The first time I played golf was in Flushing Meadows, Queens, when I was about 16 or 17. They had an 18-hole pitch-and-putt. My buddies and I would hop the fence and sneak on and play.
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