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Every parent knows that for a kid, the car is chloroform.

Ray Romano

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Ray Romano
Age: 66
Born: 1957
Born: December 21
Actor
Film Actor
Poker Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Queens
New York
Raymond Romano
Raymond Albert Ray Romano
Raymond Albert Romano
Kids
Children
Chloroform
Every
Humorous
Car
Baby
Humor
Parent
Funny

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The fact that they let me in a movie with Gene Hackman has left me with no faith in show buisness.
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As an actor, that's nerve-wracking enough [drunk and doing coke] because you have to do it at the right level.
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I'd rather be in Las Vegas 104 degrees than New York 90 degrees, you know why? Legalized prostitution. In any weather that takes the edge off.
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The more I go through parenting, the more I say I owe my mother an apology.
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After 'Raymond,' there was this big feeling of, 'What do I do next?'
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Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.
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I just don't want to play the same guy again over and over.
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You don't want to shock them and do something totally opposite, but you also want to play a different character.
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My daughter's tricycle said Some Assembly Required. It came in a jar.
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Without identical twins, you'll never get to experience entering a hotel room with one of them and watching him run into the full-length mirror because he though he saw his brother.
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Flappers sounds like where waitresses go after they're too old to work at Hooters.
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The first time I played golf was in Flushing Meadows, Queens, when I was about 16 or 17. They had an 18-hole pitch-and-putt. My buddies and I would hop the fence and sneak on and play.
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I can't complain about my career, that's for sure.
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It was very nerve-wracking for me. I had to be drunk and have a threesome. I'm not that guy. Bobby Cannavale is that guy. But it was Vegas and things got crazy, and it happened. We go to Vegas to try to sign Elvis Presley and things get crazy. My character [in Vinyl] is stoned.
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You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me.
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Mick Jagger also a music connoisseur and knows everything about that era. So, you knew the music side was going to be top-notch. It's HBO. On Men of Certain Age, if we wanted a song, it would break the bank. But, Vinyl can go all-out.
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I love standup and I haven't given it up.
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I have the show because I'm insecure. It's my insecurity that makes me want to be a comic, that makes me need the audience.
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People think living in your parents' basement until you're twenty-nine is lame. But what they don't realize is that while you're there, you save money on rent, food, and dates.
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I've had people say to me, 'Look at the sky, the fields, the ocean, the beautiful sunset. Isn't that proof positive of God?' Following that line of thought, look at the magnificent rainbows after a big rainstorm. Isn't that proof positive that God is gay?
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