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The key is to commit crimes so confusing that police feel too stupid to even write a crime report about them.
R. K. Milholland
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R. K. Milholland
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: November 25
Comics Artist
Randal Keith Milholland
Stupid
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Write
Confusing
Feel
Crimes
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Crime
More quotes by R. K. Milholland
You make me understand how wonderful it is for little lizards when they find that one special rock that's perfect for sunning themselves on. You make me lizard-happy.
R. K. Milholland
Sometimes people do things that hurt and it's not because they mean to. They just do. It doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you, but you end up hurt because of it.
R. K. Milholland
The shortest verse in the Bible is 'Jesus wept.' The only thing wrong with it is the past tense.
R. K. Milholland
It's not a matter of whether or not someone's watching over you. It's just a question of their intentions.
R. K. Milholland
The only way to be truly misogynistic is to be a woman.
R. K. Milholland
Slow and steady wins the race, then wastes no time grinding salt-caked glass in your open wounds.
R. K. Milholland
Death likes it when you play hard to get.
R. K. Milholland
Success only hurts the first time.
R. K. Milholland
The only time anyone's admitted they were a Christian before was when they were busy telling me why they're better than me.
R. K. Milholland
Being prepared for loss is never the same as being ready for it.
R. K. Milholland
Desperate is not a sexual preference.
R. K. Milholland
Sometimes old things need to go away. That way, we have room for the new things that come into our lives.
R. K. Milholland
Lies are like children. If you don't nurture them, they'll never be useful later.
R. K. Milholland
Typos are very important to all written form. It gives the reader something to look for so they aren’t distracted by the total lack of content in your writing.
R. K. Milholland
In the end, you'll know which people really love you. They're the ones who see you for who you are and, no matter what, always find a way to be at your side.
R. K. Milholland
Friendship is being there when someone's feeling low and not being afraid to kick them.
R. K. Milholland
In the end, we decide if we're remembered for what happened to us or for what we did with it.
R. K. Milholland
I guess that's how death works. It doesn't matter if we're ready or not. It just happens.
R. K. Milholland
Ed Wood served a great purpose - mainly making writers feel better about their work.
R. K. Milholland
