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If I were God - and I never understand why I'm not - I should say, Shop around, I don't think you'll find a better bargain than here.

Quentin Crisp

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Quentin Crisp
Age: 90 †
Born: 1908
Born: December 25
Died: 1999
Died: November 21
Actor
Autobiographer
Film Actor
Graphic Designer
Model
Socialite
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Sutton
London
Daniel Pratt
Denis Charles Pratt
Around
Better
Find
Never
Bargain
Think
Bargains
Thinking
Shop
Shops
Understand

More quotes by Quentin Crisp

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What would you be like if you were the only person in the world? If you want to be truly happy you must be that person.
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I recommend limiting one's involvement in other people's lives to a pleasantly scant minimum.
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I am told that you regret not what you did but what you didn't do and so that's why I do everything, so as not to have any regrets.
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In fact I try to spend at least one, if not two days without ever leaving my room. Because if I didn't, when would I recharge my batteries?
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Fear and hatred do not seem to find expression in tears.
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To say a thing is natural is to condone it, never to praise it.
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The Americans, of course, are quite dotty with hospitality.
Quentin Crisp
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A fair share of anything is starvation diet to an egomaniac.
Quentin Crisp
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Masturbation is not only an expression of self-regard: it is also the natural emotional outlet of those who...have already accepted as inevitable the wide gulf between their real futures and the expectations of their fantasies.
Quentin Crisp
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You must stop this interview now as I have come to end of my personality.
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The idea that He would take his attention away from the universe in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds is just so unlikely I can't go along with it.
Quentin Crisp
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The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
Quentin Crisp
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The absolute nothingness of death is a blessing. Something to look forward to.
Quentin Crisp
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Whenever we confront an unbridled desire we are surely in the presence of a tragedy-in-the-making.
Quentin Crisp
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When asked to give advice, I do of course give it, because I give whatever I am asked to give.
Quentin Crisp
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The flagrantly gay Quentin Crisp dealt with homophobic bullying by refusing to bow to its onslaught. His number listed in the phone directory, he responded to derogatory remarks accompanied with a stated intent to kill him by asking, Would you like to make an appointment?
Quentin Crisp
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I've never not been famous.
Quentin Crisp
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All liaisons between homosexuals are conducted as though they were between a chorus girl and a bishop. In some cases both parties think they are bishops.
Quentin Crisp
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The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as 'Soho' poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent.
Quentin Crisp
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Sex is the last refuge of the miserable.
Quentin Crisp