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I had a friend who had two degrees of being made up: when invited I would say 'Can I make up?' and he would say 'Oh yes - tinted?', or he would say, 'Oh yes - clotted?'

Quentin Crisp

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Quentin Crisp
Age: 90 †
Born: 1908
Born: December 25
Died: 1999
Died: November 21
Actor
Autobiographer
Film Actor
Graphic Designer
Model
Socialite
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Sutton
London
Daniel Pratt
Denis Charles Pratt
Tinted
Invited
Degrees
Friend
Two
Made
Make
Would
Clotted

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I am told that you regret not what you did but what you didn't do and so that's why I do everything, so as not to have any regrets.
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When I was young, I wanted to find the Great Dark Man. When I said that I realise now that people thought that by 'dark' I meant black, and that by 'great' I meant big. Whereas I only meant a strong, mysterious person someone who would 'take me away from all this.'
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It's been agony but I couldn't have done it any other way.
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Even hooligans marry, though they know that marriage is for a little while. It is alimony that is for ever.
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Never sweep. After four years the dirt gets no worse.
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I'm happy. I don't ever have to pay anything, and I don't ever have to wash the dishes, and I don't ever have to behave nicely.
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Never get involved with someone who wants to change you
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It's no good running a pig farm badly for 30 years while saying, 'Really, I was meant to be a ballet dancer.' By then, pigs will be your style.
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I learned very early in life that I was always going to need people more than they needed me
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If you live in America, you don't have to work. You can just drift along in the smiling and nodding racket.
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The court was not previously aware of the prisoner's many accomplishments. In view of these, we see fit to impose the death penalty.
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I started to shed the monstrous aesthetic affectation of my youth so as to make room for the monstrous philistine postures of middle age, but it was some years before I was bold enough to decline an invitation to Hamlet on the grounds that I knew who won.
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You will survive if you believe in yourself.
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To love another person you have to undertake some fragment of their destiny.
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Love is not enough. It must be the foundation, the cornerstone - but not the complete structure. It is much too pliable, too yielding.
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While I have very little to say in favor of sex (it's vastly overrated, it's frequently unnecessary, and it's messy), it is greatly to be preferred to the interminable torments of romantic agony through which two people tear one another limb from limb while professing altruistic devotion.
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The Americans, of course, are quite dotty with hospitality.
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Every day someone notices me and waves to me, or stops and speaks to me, or asks me for an autograph, or photographs me.
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Health consists of having the same diseases as one's neighbors.
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Why get married? For human beings, marriage is such an unnatural state. If you want monogamy, it has been said, you should marry a swan.
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