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The idea that He would take his attention away from the universe in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds is just so unlikely I can't go along with it.

Quentin Crisp

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Quentin Crisp
Age: 90 †
Born: 1908
Born: December 25
Died: 1999
Died: November 21
Actor
Autobiographer
Film Actor
Graphic Designer
Model
Socialite
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Sutton
London
Daniel Pratt
Denis Charles Pratt
Take
Religion
Giving
Universe
Speeds
Would
Idea
Bicycle
Away
Unlikely
Three
Speed
Order
Atheism
Give
Along
Ideas
Attention

More quotes by Quentin Crisp

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I had a friend who had two degrees of being made up: when invited I would say 'Can I make up?' and he would say 'Oh yes - tinted?', or he would say, 'Oh yes - clotted?'
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I'm too old to make drawings.
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I learned very early in life that I was always going to need people more than they needed me
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The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy they want to be right.
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A fair share of anything is starvation diet to an egomaniac.
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I recommend limiting one's involvement in other people's lives to a pleasantly scant minimum. This may seem too stoical a position in these madly passionate times, but madly passionate people rarely make good on their madly passionate promises.
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While I have very little to say in favor of sex (it's vastly overrated, it's frequently unnecessary, and it's messy), it is greatly to be preferred to the interminable torments of romantic agony through which two people tear one another limb from limb while professing altruistic devotion.
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It's written into the Constitution that you're allowed to pursue happiness. In England it would be considered a frivolous objective.
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The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.
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What is privacy if not for invading?
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An autobiography is an obituary in serial form with the last installment missing.
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Is not the whole world a vast house of assignation of which the filing system has been lost?
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I started to shed the monstrous aesthetic affectation of my youth so as to make room for the monstrous philistine postures of middle age, but it was some years before I was bold enough to decline an invitation to Hamlet on the grounds that I knew who won.
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The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as 'Soho' poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent.
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There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings.
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All America is much the same.
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The programs constantly repeat themselves and one another. No one has yet had the nerve to say, 'As we have nothing sensible to tell you between now and 8:30, please tune in again then.
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Vice is its own reward. It is virtue which, if it is to be marketed with consumer appeal, must carry Green Shield stamps.
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Whenever we confront an unbridled desire we are surely in the presence of a tragedy-in-the-making.
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It is true that in America I've become a national hero, but really I was a hopeless case, that was all.
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