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All mothers are working mothers.
Phyllis Diller
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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Working
Mother
Mothers
More quotes by Phyllis Diller
I wanted to become me, totally me. The more me, the better. I instinctively knew this and I was right.
Phyllis Diller
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
Phyllis Diller
You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot.
Phyllis Diller
I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, 'Take off your clothes'?
Phyllis Diller
My doctor is a family physician. He treats my family and I support his.
Phyllis Diller
self-pity is better than none.
Phyllis Diller
... if they [your children] write their names in the dust on the furniture, don't let them put the year.
Phyllis Diller
My house used to be haunted, but the ghosts haven't been back since the night I tried on all my wigs.
Phyllis Diller
The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day.
Phyllis Diller
My eight-year-old bought a bicycle with the money he saved by not smoking.
Phyllis Diller
You know you're old when your walker has an airbag.
Phyllis Diller
A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song no matter how bad they are.
Phyllis Diller
His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.
Phyllis Diller
It's true Fang and I fight, but we've never gone to bed mad. Of course, one year we were up for three months.
Phyllis Diller
Your husband is lazy if the directions on his medicine say, A teaspoon before going to bed, and in one day he uses seven bottles.
Phyllis Diller
I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing like going to bed with a good #book or a friend who's #read one.
Phyllis Diller
Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
Phyllis Diller
If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
Phyllis Diller
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
Phyllis Diller
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Phyllis Diller
