Quote

[On plastic surgery:] When I die, God won't know me. There are no two parts of my body the same age.

Phyllis Diller

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Surgery
Plastic
Parts
Dies
Age
Two
Body

More quotes by Phyllis Diller

Image
I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along - but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
Phyllis Diller
Image
If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.
Phyllis Diller
Image
... if they [your children] write their names in the dust on the furniture, don't let them put the year.
Phyllis Diller
Image
If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, 'Who could have done this? We have no enemies!'
Phyllis Diller
Image
My sister-in-law is so skinny that she has a striped dress with only one stripe.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Like all good ruins, I look better by moonlight.
Phyllis Diller
Image
You want to look younger... rent smaller children.
Phyllis Diller
Image
I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing like going to bed with a good #book or a friend who's #read one.
Phyllis Diller
Image
A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
Phyllis Diller
Image
I buried a lot of my ironing in the back yard.
Phyllis Diller
Image
I still take the pill. I don't want any more grandchildren.
Phyllis Diller
Image
He has so many muscles he has to make an appointment to move his fingers.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Right from the start my parents had left me to fend for myself. Apparently unaware that I was a kid, they invariably treated me like an adult, perhaps because they themselves were no spring chickens.
Phyllis Diller
Image
I don’t want to sound like I’m on dope, but that hour is a high it’s as good as you can feel. A wonderful, wonderful happiness, and great power.
Phyllis Diller
Image
I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Remember, only a policeman is allowed to express himself on an expressway.
Phyllis Diller
Image
Religion is such a medieval idea. Don't get me started. I have thought about every facet of religion, and I can't buy any of it.
Phyllis Diller
Image
I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'
Phyllis Diller