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I'm looking for a perfume to overpower men - I'm sick of karate.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Looking
Men
Overpower
Karate
Perfume
Dating
Sick

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My doctor is a family physician. He treats my family and I support his.
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Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
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I wanted to become me, totally me. The more me, the better. I instinctively knew this and I was right.
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Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition.
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Fang and I are always fighting. When we get up in the morning, we don't kiss we touch gloves.
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
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When I go to the beauty parlor, I always use the emergency entrance. Sometimes I just go for an estimate.
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I buried a lot of my ironing in the back yard.
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I remember once a vocational director said to Fang, You must develop some mechanical skills - like getting out of bed.
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I'll never forget my first fur. It was a modest little stole. Modest? People thought I was wearing anchovies.
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If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all.
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I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet.
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Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush.
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Choose a checked or striped wall paper. People will be halfway home before they are able to focus.
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In most states you can get a driver's license when you're sixteen years old, which made a lot of sense to me when I was sixteen years old but now seems insane.
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You can say the nastiest things about yourself without offending anyone.
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Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.
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If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.
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It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core.
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My husband is so useless that it's hard for me to be romantic with him. I get down on the floor and say, If you love me, blink your eyes.
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