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My sister was so promiscuous she broke her ankle in the glove compartment of a car.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Promiscuous
Glove
Ankles
Gloves
Sister
Broke
Car
Compartment
Sex
Ankle

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It's hard to find a negligee in my size. I wear a Junior Mister.
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I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate.
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This woman goes into a gun shop and says, 'I want to buy a gun for my husband.' The clerk says, 'Did he tell you what kind of gun?' 'No,' she replied. 'He doesn't even know I'm going to shoot him.
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My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle
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Becoming a comedienne was my way of adjusting to puberty.
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I'll never forget my first fur. It was a modest little stole. Modest? People thought I was wearing anchovies.
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If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.
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For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move.
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My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual.
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self-pity is better than none.
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Your husband is lazy if the directions on his medicine say, A teaspoon before going to bed, and in one day he uses seven bottles.
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Religion is such a medieval idea. Don't get me started. I have thought about every facet of religion, and I can't buy any of it.
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I'm looking for a perfume to overpower men - I'm sick of karate.
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Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush.
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I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, 'Take off your clothes'?
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