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It's an ill will that blows when you leave the hairdresser.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Leave
Inspirational
Hairdresser
Blows
Ill
Blow

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I'm from such an old family, it's been condemned.
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Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
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A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
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Do I believe in Witchcraft? I'm the result of it.
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If my jeans could talk, they'd plead for mercy.
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In most states you can get a driver's license when you're sixteen years old, which made a lot of sense to me when I was sixteen years old but now seems insane.
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Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
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self-pity is better than none.
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Remember, only a policeman is allowed to express himself on an expressway.
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It's hard to find a negligee in my size. I wear a Junior Mister.
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My husband is so useless that it's hard for me to be romantic with him. I get down on the floor and say, If you love me, blink your eyes.
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Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
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Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush.
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This man I was going with asked me for my finger measurements. I thought he was going to buy me a ring for Christmas, but he gave me a bowling ball.
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get married with the feeling it is going to last. Not like the bride I know who doubled the wedding cake recipe and froze one.
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My father used to call me the laughing hyena.
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If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, 'Who could have done this? We have no enemies!'
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All mothers are working mothers.
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The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
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I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet.
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