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Do not taste food while you're cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Taste
Lose
Loses
Food
May
Nerve
Nerves
Cooking
Serve

More quotes by Phyllis Diller

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It took me three weeks to stuff the turkey. I stuffed it through the beak.
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My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
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I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning.
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I was the world's ugliest baby. When I was born, the doctor slapped everybody.
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I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.
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You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
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My sister-in-law is so skinny that she has a striped dress with only one stripe.
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Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.
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This man I was going with asked me for my finger measurements. I thought he was going to buy me a ring for Christmas, but he gave me a bowling ball.
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Isn't my fur stole pitiful? How unsuccessful can a girl look? People think I'm wearing anchovies. The worst of it is, I trapped these under my own sink.
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Remarrying a husband you've divorced is like having your appendix put back in.
Phyllis Diller
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You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.
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If I wore a peek-a-boo dress, it would be like turning in a false alarm.
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Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
Phyllis Diller
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I was the world's ugliest baby. I have photos of my folks leaving the hospital with sacks over their heads... I asked my mother how to turn off the electric fan. She said 'Grab the blade!
Phyllis Diller
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Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me.
Phyllis Diller
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Like all good ruins, I look better by moonlight.
Phyllis Diller
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When you play spin the bottle, if they don't want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.
Phyllis Diller
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Tennis is like marrying for money. Love has nothing to do with it.
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I still take the pill. I don't want any more grandchildren.
Phyllis Diller