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I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
People
Blouse
Blouses
Peek
Wore
Would

More quotes by Phyllis Diller

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In most states you can get a driver's license when you're sixteen years old, which made a lot of sense to me when I was sixteen years old but now seems insane.
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My eight-year-old bought a bicycle with the money he saved by not smoking.
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Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
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Fang and I are always fighting. When we get up in the morning, we don't kiss we touch gloves.
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I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning.
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I was the world's ugliest baby. I have photos of my folks leaving the hospital with sacks over their heads... I asked my mother how to turn off the electric fan. She said 'Grab the blade!
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This man I was going with asked me for my finger measurements. I thought he was going to buy me a ring for Christmas, but he gave me a bowling ball.
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Most people get an appointment at a beauty parlor... I was committed!
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get married with the feeling it is going to last. Not like the bride I know who doubled the wedding cake recipe and froze one.
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I still take the pill. I don't want any more grandchildren.
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I was so wrinkled I could screw my hats on.
Phyllis Diller
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I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along - but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
Phyllis Diller
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My plastic surgeon ... said my face looked like a bouquet of elbows.
Phyllis Diller
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When buying a new house ... Buy the house far enough away from school so your kids can't come home for lunch.
Phyllis Diller
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My father used to call me the laughing hyena.
Phyllis Diller
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My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me.
Phyllis Diller
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Have the man at the station put the air in the tires. I did it once myself. Have you ever seen a car with a limp?
Phyllis Diller
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I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: I'm not losing a son I'm gaining a couch.
Phyllis Diller
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My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.
Phyllis Diller
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It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core.
Phyllis Diller