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I wanted to become me, totally me. The more me, the better. I instinctively knew this and I was right.

Phyllis Diller

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Phyllis Diller
Age: 95 †
Born: 1917
Born: July 17
Died: 2012
Died: August 20
Actor
Comedian
Comedienne
Film Actor
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Lima
Ohio
Phyllis Ada Driver
Phyllis Driver
Phyllis Ada Diller
Become
Better
Wanted
Right
Instinctively
Totally
Knew

More quotes by Phyllis Diller

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Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
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I will never give up. I am in my 14th year of a 10-day beauty plan.
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If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
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Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush.
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I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along - but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
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I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.
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Do not taste food while you're cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.
Phyllis Diller
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Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition.
Phyllis Diller
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My house used to be haunted, but the ghosts haven't been back since the night I tried on all my wigs.
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I buried a lot of my ironing in the back yard.
Phyllis Diller
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When I go to the beauty parlor, I always use the emergency entrance. Sometimes I just go for an estimate.
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My body's in such bad shape I wear prescription underwear.
Phyllis Diller
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A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
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Comedy is tragedy revisited.
Phyllis Diller
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Remember, only a policeman is allowed to express himself on an expressway.
Phyllis Diller
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Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.
Phyllis Diller
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My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.
Phyllis Diller
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If I wore a peek-a-boo dress, it would be like turning in a false alarm.
Phyllis Diller
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In most states you can get a driver's license when you're sixteen years old, which made a lot of sense to me when I was sixteen years old but now seems insane.
Phyllis Diller
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My plastic surgeon ... said my face looked like a bouquet of elbows.
Phyllis Diller