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If you like the stuff I do, my chances of liking you go up.
Penn Jillette
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Penn Jillette
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: March 5
Actor
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Illusionist
Jongleur
Magician
Musician
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Greenfield
Massachusetts
Penn Fraser Jillette
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More quotes by Penn Jillette
I believe very much that the most damning thing you can say about Muslims is that you're afraid to say anything because they'll hurt you.
Penn Jillette
I believe the fast track to atheism is reading the Bible. I've read it three times all the way through. It's a big part of our culture, a big part of our history. I don't just read things I agree with.
Penn Jillette
When someone is trying to interpret something for you, they always have an agenda.
Penn Jillette
A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a failure.'
Penn Jillette
I, my own damn self, am not a Tea Party supporter. I disagree with them on social liberties, our overseas wars, Obama's birthplace, Sarah Palin, and the conspicuous absence of tea at their rallies.
Penn Jillette
The Tea Party claims to want small government.
Penn Jillette
Having a Hummer is stupid. It's stupid to waste that much gas. It's stupid to waste that much money on gas. It's stupid to parade your insecurities on public roads. Hummers are stupid-looking.
Penn Jillette
Make deals with people, not paper.
Penn Jillette
Before you can read, you know the difference between a story and reality. And, of course, by the time you're old enough to do any real damage with an Uzi, you've learned that difference.
Penn Jillette
I've never revved my car at a light for an attractive woman or an auto-rival, not even as a joke.
Penn Jillette
A lot of older parents worry about being older parents. I hear people say, 'I don't want to be too old to play baseball with my son.' They worry that their kids will be embarrassed by their parents' age.
Penn Jillette
In my run-ins with Christians... I find that they really are good moral people. And we overlap on everything, and they don't seem to be the kind of people that are waiting to hear voices to tell them what to do.
Penn Jillette
Two things have always been true about human beings. One, the world is always getting better. Two, the people living at that time think it's getting worse.
Penn Jillette
One thing you learn doing magic tricks for a living is how close every performance of every magic trick is to disaster. There are no robust magic tricks. They're all hanging from a thread - sometimes literally.
Penn Jillette
I don't think I'm made of the right stuff to be a politician. I think I'm made to be a loose cannon.
Penn Jillette
So many people say, ‘You know, your taxes aren’t taken by force,’ and that’s foolish. If you don’t pay your taxes and you don’t answer the warrant and you don’t go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up.
Penn Jillette
Bacon is so good by itself that to put it in any other food is an admission of failure. You're basically saying, 'I can't make this other food taste good, so I'll throw in bacon.'
Penn Jillette
Even if I disagree with Obama on many, many things, he is certainly qualified to be president. He is certainly competent to be president.
Penn Jillette
I'm not bothered by the idea of getting old, or I guess you could say by having arrived at old. I was 10 when my mom turned 55. For 1955, she was a very old mom.
Penn Jillette
My love of computers, besides being practical, is very direct and visceral. I love the way things look on the screen.
Penn Jillette