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I never wanted to be a magician. I never wanted to be a comedian. I never wanted to be onstage.

Penn Jillette

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Penn Jillette
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: March 5
Actor
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Illusionist
Jongleur
Magician
Musician
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Greenfield
Massachusetts
Penn Fraser Jillette
Magician
Onstage
Comedian
Wanted
Never

More quotes by Penn Jillette

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In reality, many people let go of religion later in life.
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I love the feeling of shredded wheat. I love healthy bird food with a fun-to-eat feel. Then you spray them with sugar, and I'm there.
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Believing there's no God means I can't really be forgiven except by kindness and faulty memories. That's good it makes me want to be more thoughtful. I have to try to treat people right the first time around.
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Make deals with people, not paper.
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Technology is run by sex, because it's very important to people, both technology and sex.
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Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision.
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Mentally ill people come from all belief systems.
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Before you can read, you know the difference between a story and reality. And, of course, by the time you're old enough to do any real damage with an Uzi, you've learned that difference.
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So many people say, ‘You know, your taxes aren’t taken by force,’ and that’s foolish. If you don’t pay your taxes and you don’t answer the warrant and you don’t go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up.
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I mean, if I believed, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that a truck was coming at you, and you didn’t believe that truck was bearing down on you, there is a certain point where I tackle you. And this is more important than that.
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I have more contact with people who consume, for lack of a better word, my product than any other performers.
Penn Jillette
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The skills that we have are the actual magic skills - not the performing skills. We have to separate those. But the actual skills that make the tricks work, we don't get to use again.
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Behaving morally because of a hope of reward or a fear of punishment is not morality. Morality is not bribery or threats. Religion is bribery and threats. Humans have morality. We don't need religion.
Penn Jillette
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The characters and events depicted in the damn bible are fictitious. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
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I'm not bothered by the idea of getting old, or I guess you could say by having arrived at old. I was 10 when my mom turned 55. For 1955, she was a very old mom.
Penn Jillette
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A lot of older parents worry about being older parents. I hear people say, 'I don't want to be too old to play baseball with my son.' They worry that their kids will be embarrassed by their parents' age.
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No one can tell you the rules of 'Celebrity Apprentice.' No one. Donald Trump just does what he wants, which is mostly pontificating to people who are sucking up to him, while the network people try to manipulate him into making the highest-rated show they can.
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Trey Parker did 'Book of Mormon.' It's the best Broadway show I've ever seen. He does 'South Park.' It's wonderful.
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Hypocrisy is annoying but not evil. Someone who says one thing and does another has doubled their chances of being half right.
Penn Jillette
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I think that I am willing to risk my life in order to have more freedom.
Penn Jillette