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Softening what is rigid in our hearts.

Pema Chodron

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Pema Chodron
Age: 88
Born: 1936
Born: July 14
Clergyman
Philosopher
Writer
New York City
New York
Deirdre Blomfield-Brow
Softening
Rigid
Hearts
Heart

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People get into a heavy-duty sin and guilt trip, feeling that if things are going wrong, that means that they did something bad and they are being punished. That's not the idea at all.
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If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it's fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there's an arrow in your heart.
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No one ever tells us to stop running away from fear...the advice we usually get is to sweeten it up, smooth it over, take a pill, or distract ourselves, but by all means make it go away. (5)
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So many of us start along the spiritual path because we are suffering. But you must realize that for real healing to occur, there must first be deep compassion for yourself, especially the parts of yourself you dislike or consider ugly.
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Things are as bad and as good as they seem. There's no need to add anything extra.
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The most important aspect of being on a spiritual path may be to just keep moving.
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That nothing is static or fixed, that all is fleeting and impermanent, is the first mark of existence. Everything is in process.
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Suffering begins to dissolve when we can question the belief or the hope that there's anywhere to hide.
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We're afraid that this anger or sorrow or loneliness is going to last forever... Instead, acting it out is what makes it last.
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The real thing that we renounce is the tenacious hope that we could be saved from being who we are.
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True compassion does not come from wanting to help out those less fortunate than ourselves but from realizing our kinship with all beings.
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Every small problem most likely stems from the same root as large problems, and so there is no need to always go deep. One can use anything for the therapeutic process and/if this link is made.
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Ordinarily we are swept away by habitual momentum and don't interrupt our patterns slightly. When we feel betrayed or disappointed, does it occur to us to practice?
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The very first noble truth of the Buddha points out that suffering is inevitable for human beings as long as we believe that things last—that they don’t disintegrate, that they can be counted on to satisfy our hunger for security.
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If you’re aggressive in your dealings, that’s how you’ll be regarded in the world. You might smile and give generously, but if you frequently explode in anger, people never feel comfortable in your presence and you’ll never have peace of mind.
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We sow the seeds of our future hells or happiness by the way we open or close our minds right now.
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Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic-this is the spiritual path.
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To live is to be willing to die over and over again.
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Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves.
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When we resist change, it’s called suffering. But when we can completely let go and not struggle against it, when we can embrace the groundlessness of our situation and relax into it’s dynamic quality, that’s called enlightenment
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